


Fear

by citypaintedred



Category: The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Depressing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Epic Bromance, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, m/m - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-04
Updated: 2017-04-04
Packaged: 2018-10-14 18:35:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10542195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/citypaintedred/pseuds/citypaintedred
Summary: Fear was something not even Barry Allen could outrun.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Part one? maybe. Forgive any typos, not going to beta.

Fear.

Fear was something not even Barry Allen could outrun. No matter how hard he tried, fear was always there lately. Fear had landed him in the Cortex medical bed once again after Wally had been taken and he’d nearly easily been killed by Savitar in one fell swoop. The thought of losing Iris to that monster had consumed him. He’d taken Joe’s words to a new height, his every waking moment had been focused on saving her life. Keeping her safe, he hadn’t thought he’d become the reason for her unhappiness and for his own in doing so. 

Iris was his one shining light, and the moment she’d called off the engagement Barry could feel his world lose it’s color. Not even the physical pain of nearly being stabbed through with a strange alien weapon had felt as bad as losing Iris and Wally in one shot. 

Barry lie there, staring up at the ceiling feeling nothing. He was numb. Only the look on his foster father’s face gave him any hint of what needed to be done anymore. Wally needed to be saved, and Barry was the only way to do it. He was the only one fast enough to break him free of the speed force and so he prepared himself. He stripped away any remaining medical equipment much to Caitlin’s silent protest, and left the medical unit to the pipes.

The Speed Force was like taking a walk through space with your eyes shut, there was a possibility he’d get lost without even finding Wally but in that moment Barry wasn’t so sure he cared. Jesse was there, and Oliver Queen was on call if the city needed saving. 

Joe hated that his only option was to send Barry into that place if he wanted his son back, it meant the possibility of losing both sons at once but he needed his family. He placed a hand on Barry’s shoulder and looked him in the eye. “You come back to me, understand? Both of you.” The man could tell something was wrong, he tried to be the anchor to hold Barry together but it was almost like the younger man was hanging on by a string and that string was snapping before his eyes. “I know.” Barry responded, trying for a smile but uncertain if he managed it enough to convince Joe that he meant the words he said. 

There was a problem with this scenario if he was right in his speed force theory. One speedster would need to stay behind to take the others place, Barry intended it to be him. Wally didn’t deserve the nightmare loop that place had trapped him in. Barry would send him home, but that was the end of his plans. He glanced at Iris, searching for words to say but came up empty and pulled the cowl over his face instead. Cisco gave him a pat on the shoulder and echoed Joe’s sentiment, not wanting to lose his best friend wordlessly. Barry could only nod, feeling a moment of guilt as he looked his dark haired friend in the eye and headed toward his starting position.

No more words or hesitations, Barry ran. He ran for Wally’s life, red and yellow streaks in his wake filling up the pipeline as Oliver Queen joined the wayward group of onlookers and stared in silence. The hooded man didn’t quite understand what Barry was going to do, but he needed help and reassurance and that was what he would provide.  
Cisco turned and bumped into him. “Jesus Oliver, make a sound! I’m getting you a bell or something.” He exclaimed half heartedly, which earned only the faintest look of sympathy from the Arrow. Cisco was trying to maintain his humor but truth be told he wasn’t feeling it after the events of the day, so he turned back to Barry and watched in silence as his friend once again did things none of them ever thought possible without even breaking a sweat.

In the blink of an eye, Barry was gone and everyone went their separate ways except for Oliver Queen. He was going to maintain a vigil for the Scarlet Speedster until he returned in one piece if his city allowed it. Jesse Quik was there, they had a speedster on hand should the city really be in jeopardy. Oliver wanted to be there for Barry. He knew how much this job weighed on his young counterpart and had heard stories of the last time Barry and the Speed Force had met. Barry had been so starved to tell anyone about it that he’d confided in Oliver, and Oliver took it to heart. He believed in Barry, more than the younger man knew. Oliver sat in the room while Cisco watched Barry’s vitals on his monitor in intense silence.

They’d dropped at one point off the screen, causing a panic in both men for a moment. Neither were prepared to lose the Flash that day. Neither were ready for the future byline to come as quickly as it did.

In the eerie between worlds Earth, Barry searched for Wally. It was almost like the world he was in the first time he was struck by lightning and sent into a coma. Everything was nearly the same except all the familiar faces were gone. Inside the CCPD it was dark, computer monitors flickered like some kind of awful D rated horror movie. “Wally?” Barry called out into the dimly lit room, only to be greeted by a face he recognized. Eddie. The first man he ever let down as the Flash, the first to die because he wasn’t able to save him. Barry didn’t want to see that face. It was hard to swallow. His first failure that lead to so man others. 

“Where’s Wally?” He asked soundly, knowing it wasn’t really Eddie in front of him but the Speed Force. It was severely unamused with him at that. It didn’t want to help. It wanted him to pay for his lies and Barry already planned to. When it sent a Time Wraith after him, Barry sped toward the next location and barely beat it. CCPD disappeared behind him and melted into a hospital like hallway. Needlessly long and dreary, it seemed to go on for miles. 

“...Wally?” Barry asked again, keeping his mind focused on the task at hand. The Speed Force was easy to get lost in. Barry remembered this from experience. He could see the young Flash finally through a window in a hospital room where he looked just as broken a Barry felt inside. He reached for the door handle to yank it open when a blast of cold ice froze it shut. “I told you that wasn’t allowed.” The voice of Captain Cold filled his ears, but he knew again Snart was dead. The Speed Force spoke with a chill that could match the cold gun he carried in his hand, and Barry looked down at the ice in defeat. “...I’m taking his place.” He responded, the Speed Forces eyes only grew angrier as it aimed the gun at the Flash.

“You aren’t done yet.” It sneered, Barry shook his head as he reached for the icy handle again and pounded at it with a fist to shatter it open. “That’s not your choice. It’s mine.” He responded, eyes half on Snart and half on the lock as his hand vibrated against it causing the bits to crumble to the ground and Wally to look up in surprise. The loop was broken, Barry forced a strained smile and reached for his hand. “Hey, it’ll be okay. Just run. Cisco’s waiting.” Wally was a mixture of shocked and crushed. “You’re not staying.” He said in attempt to be brave for all of them, taking Barry’s wrist and preparing to race with him out that door. Barry stood his ground and calmly shook his head. “I am. One of us has to stay behind, and it’s not going to be you. I need you to save Iris. She needs you, Joe needs you.” They all needed Wally, they wouldn’t miss him.

“Run Wally. Or all this? Doesn’t matter.” He motioned to both of their suits, and Wally looked back at Barry with a hardened but sad look. He’d caused a lot of this to happen, he was sure of it. This sudden change in Barry probably wouldn’t have existed if he hadn’t exploded on him earlier on, but part of him knew if he tried to push Barry to return with them that he wouldn’t be able to beat the more experienced speedster. Reluctantly Wally pulled away. “..We’re coming back for you.” Barry could only offer a thin smile as he turned to face the hospital bed himself and Wally ran. He ran faster than he’d run before. Past the furious wrath of the Speed Force firing Snart’s cold gun at him, faster than the wraith on his heels, and fast enough to break through the front doors of the CCPD which actually ended up leading directly back to the Cortex thanks to Vibe and his speed.

Wally skidded to a stop. Trail of yellow fading behind him a he did and both Oliver and Cisco looked up. Cisco scrambled over to the young Kid Flash and hit the panic button on his phone to alert his friends that something was happening without having to say so in words. “Wally? Are you okay?” He’d been so focused on the younger man that he hadn’t realized Barry wasn’t with him. Only when Oliver stood and looked around did he realize they weren’t all there yet. “..Where’s Barry?” He asked hesitantly, not sure he wanted to know the answer.

“He stayed.” Wally said with a frown and his hand balled into a fist. “That idiot stayed.” Oliver and Cisco felt their blood run cold as they looked back at the place where Barry had disappeared the first time as if they looked hard enough maybe the man in red would return. 

There was nothing but silence as Joe, Iris and Caitlin joined the group in the pipeline room. “Wally!” Iris exclaimed and raced down to embrace her brother. Wally could barely enjoy the moment. Joe looked between Oliver and Cisco and frowned “Where’s Barry?” He too looked back at the place their Flash, his son had disappeared only to find emptiness and regret. He’d put so much pressure on Barry to keep his family safe, that he’d lost one of them in turn. He knew it in his heart without them having to say the words that Barry had sacrificed himself to the Speed Force and tears welled in the usually strong cop’s eyes silently.

Oliver’s own eyes hardened. “I’m going in to get him back.” He wasn’t about to lose Barry to his own powers. Iris’s joy was dampened by the absence of Barry too as her brother crumbled in her arms. In spite of their problems she didn't love him less. The things Wally had seen were too much for him, the losses equally painful. Suddenly he realized the real burden of being a speedster and how tired Barry must have been, carrying the weight of the world all this time.


End file.
